How to be a professional Oral Examiner

I am starting to think that other than the cold/flu/sore throat epidemic that they are having at PhillyFellaVille (see previous posting: point 5), they are also hit by the terrible sleeping virus.

As I was just 2 tables away from the infected ones, I was in grave danger of being hit by the sleeping virus. Fortunately, I managed to 'siam' it thanks to my strong immune system developed recently whilst at Simpleville (didn't get any virus fr jjb/hamster/choco despite close proximity.... muuuahhhh hahahahaha).

But, since not many examiners are as fortunate as I am, to develop such strong immune system against such deadly virus, I took it upon myself to help all future Oral Examiners to keep awake while assessing candiates during O level Oral exams.

Here's a list of the things you can do to keep you awake in order to maintain your professionalism to grade candidates fairly and effectively.

Ways to keep yourself awake while on duty as an Oral examiner

Disclaimer: The following set of instructions could cause you to lose your job. Master Cartwheeler shall not be responsible for any loss of income. All characters and names mentioned within this entry are fictitious and are not related in anyway with anybody living or dead or fictitious, and any similarities are coincidental.

1) Get your adrenaline pumping again by doing a 50 meters dash to the toilet and back in 1 ½ mins in between change of candidates. If you have my superpower cartwheeling abilities, you could try it to speed up the time but please do not try this at the expense of distracting the other candidates from another group. Remember..... maintain your professionalism you must!!!

2) Freak yourself out by telling yourself that the sudden music coming from your ipod (whilst on hold and in the switched off mode) is the result of some ghost lurking around especially since EL oral exams are held during the Hungry Ghost Festival.

3) Predict winning 4D numbers from students' IC.... most likely numbers to strike this weekend are... 7811, 0490, 4434, 2057.

4) Stare at the reverse osmosis water they provide, to look out for any brown living or dead organisms.
NOTE: Prolong staring will only lead you to memorise the following phrase (XXXwater is crystal clear drinking water produced by advanced water purification and membrane technologies).

5) Remain poise under sleepy conditions by SMILING (but not too much unless you are sure you are free from the evil "green-veggie-in-between-teeth" syndrome).