The Memory Keeper's Daughter

Just finished this wonderful story.. I simply have to share... Never read such a compelling story in awhile.

The Memory Keeper's Daughter, by KIM Edwards is a brilliantly crafted family drama that explores every mother's silent fear: what would happen if your child dies or worse, you lost your child and she grew up without you.

The story started out on a winter night in 1964 (as you can see from the snow flakes on the cover page). Dr. David Henry was forced by a blizzard to deliver his own twins. His son, born first, was perfectly healthy. Yet when his daughter was born, he saw immediately that she had Down's syndrome. Rationalising it as a need to protect Norah, his wife, he made a split second decision that altered all of their lives forever. He asked his nurse to take the baby away to an institution and never to reveal the secret. But Caroline, the nurse, could not leave the infant. Instead, she disappeared into another city to raise the child herself.

So begins this beautifully told story that unfolds over a quarter of a century in which these two families, ignorant of each other, are yet bound by David Henry's fateful decision that winter night.

The Memory Keeper is actually refering to the father, David. Why Memory Keeper you may ask... In the story, he took up photography after the birth of his children. After giving away his daughter, his guilt and the longing for her grew strong but he had no one to share those feelings with. He simply couldn't bring himself to be close to his wife and son as they reminded him of what he did and yet, he was afraid to tell them the truth. So the only way he felt close to them was to take their pictures, process it in solitude in his darkroom (they were using film them obviously) and freeze the moments so that he'll never forget.. keeping the memories with him. In fact, David said, "Photography is all about secrets.... The secrets we all have and will never tell."

Hmmmmm... Most photographers would beg to differ.

The Memory Keeper's Daughter captures the way life takes unexpected turns and how the mysterious ties that hold a family together help us survive the heartache that occurs when long-buried secrets burst into the open. It is an compelling tale of redemptive love. At some parts of the book, I even had to take a pause from reading because I was simply too emotional. Perhaps, some emotions of the characters reflect mine as well. It was not the events that made the story interesting but the ripples the events creates in the lives of the characters. In life, it's like that too...

During the time I was reading the book, I found myself seeing more people with Down's syndrome. It could be that I did not take notice of them before reading the book. It did occur to me what I would do if I have a child with Down's syndrome? Obviously I do not wish that to happen but you never know. What sort of decisions would I make?

Decisions are made every day, and with each decision and each event, something else follows. Some will be a mystery, some a little more predictable. But whatever it is, we have to live with it. I just hope I won't be like David in the end... He did everything thinking that he was protecting his family but in so doing, distances himself from them... seldom smiling.... always closed up and guarded... just keeping the memories with photography.


Here are some quotes for us to ponder:

"Others won't care how much we know, until we show them how much we care. "

"If someone does not smile at you, be generous and offer your own smile. Nobody needs a smile more than the one who cannot smile to others. "