Saturday, September 24, 2005

AANF (acronyms are no fun)

What's with the acronyms.... We have SEM, WITS, LEAPS, PRIME, CIP, CDP, HRC, SAIL, ACES, ESSS, TRAISI, EPMS, TLLM, TSLN, VITAL, IP, SPA, SOW, SIO, PSLE, CCA, NE, ETD, CPDD, PDCM, COMPASS, CRAP.....

What do they mean or represent?? Frankly speaking, there are so many that I doubt any Jedis can remember.....but seriously, some of them can really be so forced that you just don't understand how lame it can be.. Take ACES day for example.... for 4 years I've always known ACES day as the day when the whole of Simpleville does some workout or something.... Never bothered to find out what ACES mean.... Just realised recently that it stands for All Children Exercise Simultaneously... Duh... if that's the case.. why are the Jedis exercising??? ... hmmm think I shall boycott ACES day next year... unless someone realises the mistake and changes it to EMES (Everyone Must Exercise Simultaneously) day.


Currently doing the HRC... What's HRC? Nope, it's not Hard Rock Cafe. It's a Holistic Report Card where Jedis comment on the young padewans on their behaviour and progress whilst in training. The only condition is that it must only be positive remarks in order not to damage the child's future.


Hence, for a big bully like Tan Ah Meng... his comments would most probably go something like this:

Ah Meng is a charismatic padewan who has the ability to motivate his peers into doing things that they wouldn't normally do.

For Lord L who sleeps in class and ignores his Master when he gets scolded... his comments are as such:

Lord L is able to maintain poise under stressful situations. He is always calm and composed, (meaning sedated) and has this ability to remain focused in his meditation.

For XYZ who always talks and disrupts lessons, his comments would go something like this:

XYZ is an outspoken pupil who contributes actively during class discussions. He is able to share his ideas so readily that had he been a regular participant at the Speaker Corner in Hong Lim Park, the corner wouldn't have died a natural death. (or something to that effect....)

So what's HRC again????? Hardly Realistic Comments. Yup... that's more like it.

The question is why is our society so protective of the young padewans? Why can't we reflect how they really behave? ..... "cos we don't want to write negative remarks which might be detrimental to the kids' future. " "we must present the best and bring out the best in the young ones."

But seriously, who would read the comments in the future? Which employer would judge or hire a person by reading such comments if practically everyone's comments sounds so good? Wouldn't we also present a distorted picture of the child to their parents who think their precious ones are angels in the Villes? Just give the young padewans a wholesome image and everything's gonna be alright. Seems like everything's for show only...

But who are we to question what we do? Who are we to challenge the ACRONMYS... I can just rant about it over here and perhaps declare the month of September a IHDHRC (I Hate Doing H R C) month. Nothing more... That's life... Accept things as it is.. Nothing more, nothing less.

So without further ado.. I shall humbly retreat to continue typing the HRC for my young padewans before the due date... and package them as amazingly outstanding padewans so that they may have a brighter future and that their parents be happy and merry.

Meanwhile, here's a few more acronyms for y'all ............................. LWKUA, QPG, KRP, LPR, BP, LP, ALLL, BWU, SP, JTOM, IBT, IBLU, LM, LUA............

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Wednesday, September 14, 2005

What's a Blog?

According to www.blogger.com ........................

What's a blog?

A blog is your easy-to-use web site, where you can quickly post thoughts, interact with people, and more. All for FREE.

In SimpleVille ................................................

What's a blog?

It's a platform for 'free' expressions, witty sacarsms, personal 'attacks', encouragement, teaching of values and poetry (haiku and sonnet), bonding, and show & tell amongst the Master Jedis.

It's a platform for young padewans to know their Master Jedis better and understand what they go through.

It's a platform where (sadly) we can no longer write what we want and how we want cos the PEOPLE are watching and our identities have been exposed. Ggggrrrhhhh...

It's a platform to fulfill the IT Master Plan.... through online journals for English and Mother Tongue, newspaper commentary, book and movie reviews for English subject, food reviews for Home Economics, forum discussion for humanities subjects..... etc....

Beware young Padewans....

It's your turn to start your blogs....


The question is.... will it be sustainable or will it die a natural death?

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Saturday, September 10, 2005

Day 6 and it is finished...


As mentioned in my earlier entries, I'll sort my desk out in one week's time.

Today is the sixth day and just as it is in Genesis:

"God looked at everything he had made, and he found it very good. Evening came, and morning followed--the sixth day. The heavens and the earth and all their array were completed. Since on the seventh day God was finished with the work he had been doing, he rested on the seventh day from all the work he had undertaken. So God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work he had done in creation."

So my task in cleaning up my mess is completed but can I rest tomorrow and enjoy my Sabbath Day? Noooooooooo... I'm gonna run 6km with my other Master Jedis in yet another RACE...... The Sheares Bridge Half-Marathon.... I hope I don't disappoint my fellow Jedis since I'll most probably be the slowest... unless Fatcat.. oopps I mean Madcat is in my team... keke..

Hmmm.... why am I always caught up in a RACE??? When will I ever see the finishing line???

My spirit is willing but my flesh is weak....

Friday, September 09, 2005

The Amazing Race.... 1st Episode..

After 72,000 miles around the galaxy, the four young padewans, BerDoinkDoink, MaMaMia, Eweeee, and Semi-dark choco had landed in Tampines Regional Library, the final pitstop. They ran, they flew, they schemed but sadly, it was not enough to win THE AMAZING RACE.

Starting from the Nerdy Loser Building near Bapok Street, they sped off to White Sands where they had to search for a cooking recipe and perform a cooking demonstration with whatever props they had.

At the next stop, at Geylang East, they had to embarrass themselves and do a role play based on a comic strip. All was well and they embarked on their journey to the next route marker.

Things were not so smooth sailing for the 4 young padewans as they encountered a dark force at the third route marker at Bedok. An evil Lord Marshall gave them a tough task. That almost caused them an elimination as they struggled against all odds to complete the task. But persevere they did, and they managed to find an Indian Folktale and dramatised it with ease.

Finally, the final pit stop was made known and they headed out to Tampines Regional Library. Due to the 1 hour yield placed on all teams, they were all not able to proceed with the fourth and final task. All teams were told to fill their empty stomachs and be back by 2.30pm.

Determined as ever, the four young padewans reported to me that they were going to sacrifice their lunch to wait in front of the doors to the final pitstop to ensure a first position which they already had... and that was at 1pm.........

Alas, they lack the will. The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak... They got hungry. They succumbed to their needs. They walked away and gave their first position away at 1.30............... (after 30 minutes of waiting)

Nevertheless, there are other prizes which are yet to be announced. Henceforth, I will now leave my unknown location in the galaxy which turned out to be Simpleville anyway and depart for the final pit stop in the hope that they'll walk away with something.... perhaps a lesson, an adventure, a memory that they'll never forget.

4 young padewans here I come.....

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Thursday, September 08, 2005

The Amazing Race

The Amazing Race is on... tomorrow.

I, Master Cartwheeler, will be bringing 4 young and eager padewans to Nerdy Losers Building to embark on an adventure of their lifetime (like real)....

What are the challenges ahead? They will scour through the entire galaxy, in search of clues to different pit stops (at other Nerdy Loser Buildings) from 8am to 2pm, completing embarrasing and sometimes intellectual missions to gain their clues. Where will I be? Together with the other Jedi Masters from different planets, I'll be stationed at an unknown location in the vast galaxy, guiding the young ones with my force till around 1pm. At that crucial hour, I'll be told of the final pit stop where I'll await the arrival of Simpleville's pride and joy (that is.. if they don't come in last!!!)

The competition is tough.... 25 villes and 100 padewans, competing for the top prize of $1200 (in the form of printers and food vouchers... duh... and we were expecting CA$H)

The question is...........................

Will the 4 young and eager padewans from Simpleville beat the rest to win the race? Will they survive the elements of rain and shine? Will the roadblocks slow them down? Will the detours disorientate them? Will they outwit, outlast and outplay the other contestants (oops wrong catch phrase from the wrong show)?

Stay tune to find out more... in the next... Amazing Race...

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Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Master DarkChocoindryice VS Cockroach Empire.......... 4 - 0




VS
4 - 0
The following story is based on a true story which happened not too long ago at Simpleville
..............................................................................................
Once upon a time in a far far away galaxy, there lived a princess, Princess 'master_cartwheeler'. She was known for her feminity, her smile and her ravishingly good looks. She was also very caring, like a sister to all. Alas, there was a flaw. She had no control of her life as she was controlled by the evil stepmother. As such, she was locked up in a dungeon where she lived in filth.
One day, she decided to take stock of her mess and clean up all that she possessed in the dungeon. The first day was fine and all was well. However, on the second day, in a dark corner of the dungeon, she chanced upon a cockcroach empire which infested the area.
"Arggghhhh..., " Princess 'master_cartwheeler' screamed as she leapt in horror, losing all her charm and grace. Miraculously, a Master Jedi "DarkChocoindryice" from the land of Naboo heard her cries and jumped to her rescue...
"Hiiiyaaakk... woong woong..." as Master Jedi stomped and slashed the evil king and queen of cockroaches to their doom with his trusted lightsabre. The now unglam Princess 'master_cartwheeler' hopped onto a nearby chair hugging her secret lover Mr Beasley to calm herself from the horror she just witnessed. At last, all was calm....
But only for awhile....(the story is not over)... As Master Jedi "DarkChocoindryice" was taking his leave, he accidentally stepped on a bag that was found in the dark corner. With his big feet, he squished out 2 or more cockroach eggs and nymphs covered in slime!!!!!!!!
"An empire of cockroaches, I killed??... Die, they must. Fear not.. Princess 'master_cartwheeler'. The force is with you..... "
With that, he whisked back to his Land of Naboo whilst the Princess sat and comtemplated what just happened so far....
Moral of the story: Clean up your desk every now and then... Good luck to those for have not cleared your mess!!!

Monday, September 05, 2005

End of Day One... and it's still WIP..



Work in Progress.......
I shall persevere on.... with PRIDE...

Gotcha!!!


Muaahhhh ha ha ha ha.... I'm not the only one!!!!

Picking up the pieces...










One person's mess over three desks...

Life can be a mess if you have no control over it
And if you choose to avoid the problems in your life,
you'll just let your problems grow and affect others
especially the ones you love...

It's time to stop the spread of my mess and take control of my life or at least my workstation....
Give me one week and everything shall be in order....

Then again.....deception is a powerful tool which I'll continue to use....

Introducing.... Mr Beasley...




M R . B E A S L E Y
Written by Corrinne May Ying Foo Copyright 1997


You don't have to drive a fancy car
Don't have to quote me Shakespeare just to woo me
Yeah I see your nervous laughter
when you're trying to crack some joke
Well, you don't fool me
I'd like to see your eyes through those goggles that you're wearing
Don't try to hide away
Just be yourself, Mr. Beasley
I don't need your show of attitude
Coz' it's your soul that makes me fall in love with you
You don't know this but I see you in the church when you are praying
You just move me
And my friend Sue she tells me you've been teaching kids for free
Mr. Philanthropy
I'd like to see your eyes through those goggles that you're wearing
Don't try to hide away
Just be yourself, Mr. Beasley
I don't need your show of attitude
Coz' it's your soul that makes me fall in love with you
Be yourself, Mr. Beasley
I don't need your show of attitude
Coz' it's your soul that makes me fall in love with you
I'd like to see your eyes through those goggles that you're wearing
Don't try to hide away


Thanks 3E1 for this wonderful companion... but the best gift is yet to come... so work hard and be good... as always...

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Saturday, September 03, 2005

And the award goes to.....

2002..... Most Feminine Teacher Award
2003..... Best Smile Teacher Award
2004..... Best Looker Teacher Award (there was a shortage of Chio teachers then)
2005..... Most Sisterly Teacher Award
2006..... ??????????????????????????

I would like to congratulate my fellow Jedi Masters for their awards as well...

Most Stylish ---- Master Kungfu Hamster (p.s. Stylish is not the same as Stylo)
Most Spontaneous -- Master Chocoindryice
Best Smile --- Master Bioarmour Craze (aka Madcat)

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