Silent Vocals VI ~ In Motion
7 months of training ...
7 minutes of performance...
A lifetime that I’ll cherish those moments...
Almost couldn't make it for this concert as there's no way I could take leave from school to attend the intensive rehearsals in the afternoons a few days before the concert. Also, I was supposed to have flown off to Vietnam for the Regional Teachers' Conference during that period of time. But God seemed to have planned it for me. Growth Camp happened to be during the two days of intensive rehearsals and on the actual day. And some time in January, I was told that the RTC is in April instead of March. And so it is, I was able to perform one last time at Victoria Theatre. Though it will most probably* be my last concert… it was a first for a number of events:
1st time I cried on stage after the concert
This shot was taken after we were both crying / tearing.
- At the end of the concert, I thanked my dance instructress, Silvia Yong for all the years of training and encouragement. Though she started teaching me in 2004, she made a great impact in my dance ‘career’. I would have stopped dancing if not for her. Her contemporary style of choreography really spurred me to want to be a better dancer. She fascinates me with her seemingly impossible to do steps and her fast paced choreography that leaves me panting and gasping for air after each rehearsal. Watching her perform at the Esplanade truly inspires me to be like her too. She really showed her passion for dance through the sacrifices she has made and the courage to do something that many would not do. We dancers never fail to admire both Silvia and her husband... Together with her dancer and choreographer husband, Kuik Swee Boon, they look like the perfect couple.
For all that she has done for me, I am truly grateful. I teared when I told her I’ll miss being in her class and that I won’t be dancing for AJ anymore. She tried to persuade me, telling me that age is not a barrier, using herself as an example. It was a difficult decision but I have to move on. She teared as well.. And so, seeing her watery eyes, made me cry even more… so much so that my dance president who was standing beside us teared too.
Thank you Silvia. I'm eternally grateful.
1st time I joined the concert without any other dancers from my batch
These girls ranges fr 20 - 25 yrs old, with the exception of me of course.
- One of the dance members from my batch is currently the teacher-in-charge of dance society in AJ. When she first emailed my batch to find out who were still keen on dancing for the concert, 3 dancers responded. And because I thought I won’t be the only one from my batch joining, I committed myself. Unfortunately, the other two really couldn’t find the time because the two are already mothers. And so, I was the only representative from my batch.
1st time I took photos for the concert
- In a way, it was a dream come true to merge both my passion in dance and photography in one. It was rather hectic, rushing to put on make up, snapping pictures of the preparations, snapping pictures of the rehearsals, trying to recall the steps before my item is on and then performing. It was a not easy as it was my first dance shoot. It was also technically challenging because the lighting for this concert is rather dark. And it being my first time, I didn't know what settings to fix and what to look out for. For example, I kept running out of CF cards and battery life at the critical moments despite preparing all that in advance. Didn't expect two fully charged batteries to be flat so fast. There were also a lot of blur shots. Out of the 6 dances, I only managed to shoot 4 items. I had to get ready for my finale item. And because I was dancing in one item, I'll most probably not get any pictures of me dancing. That's the problem with taking photos and dancing at the same time. Sigh. Can't get the best of both worlds.
1st time I received so many flowers and gifts
- Many thanks to those who came. I was really touched by your sweet gestures and your moral support. I think I’ll never receive so much flowers at one go in my life… Thank you all for everything.
1st time my dear friend attended my dance concert
- I feel so elated that my ‘BFF’ could make it for my concert, having missed all my other concerts during previous years. It meant a lot to me for it will be my last concert. Thank you babe for coming.
My 6th dance alumni concert performance, Silent Vocals VI ~ In Motion, ended last night. Not that I’m biased but I feel that the choreography for this concert has reached a new high. The dance items were so technically challenging for amateur dancers like us but the dances did pushed us to level up our techniques. Would like to quote fr my batch’s dance president’s SMS after the concert: “Was very touched by you all as an audience cos only we know the hard work and sacrifices behind every performance. It was a very good show with high standards. Think the alumni was exceptionally impressive ;p” That message really stirred me up. I was very touched.
Some time ago in September 2007 when we first started training, we kept thinking that it was a long while more to this concert but as the months went by, we felt that time was not on our side. Even then, I was looking forward to the concert hoping it’ll come soon. Now that it is over, I wished it didn’t end. It was a truly emotional night for me because at the back of my mind, I knew it would be my last (or rather I’ll try very hard to make it my last). Having been in the dance alumni from 1998 to 2008, I think it is about time I move on. 10 years seem to be an ‘overstay’. As it is, I’m officially the longest serving AJ dance alumni member. It’s kind of odd going back to Anderson JC seeing all the younger college students, feeling somewhat old. Yet, this place was like a home to me. A place I’m familiar with. A place where my passion for dance was ignited. A place where I could be completely at ease with my fellow dancers.
I was flipping through my dance photo albums and looking back at those moments, from training for SYF, performing in Korea, my first alumni concert in the school hall to the various concerts held in Kallang Theatre and Victoria theatre. It’s amazing how the camaraderie is so strong among the dancers who come from different batches… Year after year, I see familiar faces and sometimes new ones but in each of them, I feel their passion for dance, their dedication to the group and their talents and grace during performance.
Now that it has finally ended, I can’t help but feel sad and lost… There was a sense of depression when I woke up this morning… There was a strong inertia to do my work and the rhythm of the music and sequence of the dance steps kept refreshing in my mind… I started to think of what I’ll miss and I’ve come up with these:
Bruises on my arms & legs – The only times when I get severely bruised are when I’m training for dance. It may seem that I’m some sort of sadist but I do like seeing the bruises as it is an indication that I went all out for the dance (though sometimes, it’s just because I was clumsy and failed to protect myself).
Vigorous training – Initially it was once a week. Then twice a week and towards the last two weeks, almost everyday. No matter how tired I get from working the whole day, I will suddenly be energized when I train… It’s odd how something so strenuous can lift my spirits up. It’s odd how my headaches or worries just melt away during trainings. I realised it is the motions and concentration during training that I find comfort & peace.
The smell of the LL (dance studio) and the school hall –The smell isn’t pleasant for sure… but I miss the times we try to avoid the smelly spots on the dance studio floor… and how we complained so many times but still continued to dance despite nothing done to rid the smell. One common habit is that we walk bare feet around AJ; in the studio, in the hall and even to the toilet. Black dusty feet have become a feature of being a dancer... I truly understand what some of my students feel when they have their 'illegal' shoes confiscated.
The messed up costumes – It seems that the tailor will always mess up the dance costumes, distorting the original designs and we have to always alter them last minute. We have no choice though because there are really very few tailors who do dance costumes in Singapore. And so, my fellow dancers and I came to a conclusion that not only must we be able to dance, we must be able to sew… to salvage our badly tailored costumes.
The roller coaster emotions - I'll definitely miss the excitement before performance & the feeling of sheer joy after the dance concert, knowing that everything was done right – This is a given. All dancers will never forget these moments. Neither would I.
Victoria Theatre – There’s something magical about VT. It’s small, old and yet charming. Of course I hope to perform at the Esplanade but VT is a familiar place to us. We know the ins and outs of that place. I’m really going to miss performing there.
Lastly, my fun-loving dancers & my sweet dance instructress – With the lame jokes we crack, there’s never a dull moment… we somehow enjoy being silly and we even laugh at our mistakes in our dance steps. But we have our serious sides especially nearing the concert when emotions flare up in even the most demure dancer. Our dance instructress has been ever so patient with us, sharing our sense of humour and always motivating us. I’m going to miss seeing them on a weekly basis but thankfully, with Facebook, we’ll somehow keep in touch… or rather ‘poke’.
And so, after Silent Vocals 6, I think I have to really retire… Don’t think I’m up for it anymore when 2010 comes. Moreover, my dance friends closer to my batch are also considering ‘retiring’ too. If that is really so, it will be a pity that I won’t be participating in Silent Vocals 7 which would have also been my 7th dance concert as a dance alumni member.
But I really have to move on…
And so, I’m closing this dance chapter with AJ dance as a dancer… but I’ll continue to help out in any way possible…
In March 2006, I blogged that I would take a bow and retire. I mapped out my dance ‘resume’
I think it's time I do a little update!
1996 -- JC 1 Dance Member
1997 -- SYF Dance (Gold) Performed in Dance Presentation Opening Night at Kallang / Represented S'pore to perform in Korea for the 3rd ASIAN Youth Festival
1998 -- Silent Vocals II (School Hall... Hey! That's our debut.. low budget then)
1999 -- Training & rehearsal for the next concert
2000 -- Silent Vocals III (NYP auditorium) (didn’t dance, just helped out in make up n lighting)
2001 -- Training & rehearsal for the next concert / Danced for the Alumni's 1st AGM + dinner + concert
2002 -- Silent Vocals IV (Alphaville auditorium - Brand new and free!! Why not?)
2003 -- Training & rehearsal for the next concert
2004 -- Colours of Emotion (Self-choreographed - Victoria Theatre) / Juvenescence (AJ's 20th Anniversary Concert - Kallang Theatre)
2005 -- Qi (七,棋,启,气) (Victoria Theatre)
2006 –- Received Appreciation Award during AJ's 22nd College Day / Silent Vocals V ~ The Kaleidoscope (Victoria Theatre) (1st time I was not involved accept to give moral support and watch the concert)
2007 -- Training & rehearsal for the next concert
2008 -- Silent Vocals VI ~ In Motion (Victoria Theatre)
7 months of training...
7 minutes of performance...
Truly amazing...Truly unforgettable... Truly emotional...
My sincere thanks to Silvia and my fellow dancers...
Thank you for making my final concert with AJ Dance alumni a memorable one...
20th March 2008.
* Note: While I’m deeply serious about retiring, I won’t hesitate to join if I know my other friends are dancing again or if the venue is at the Esplanade, but I know the chances are very slim.
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Labels: Dance, Decisions, Resolutions